BGF

I have this best friend. He has a girlfriend. But a while back he told me that he actually liked me for years but he couldn’t do anything since I was in a ‘relationship’ back then. So that’s why he has a girlfriend now that’s not me. He admitted that at first their relationship was rocky because the girlfriend found out he only took her as a girlfriend because he couldn’t get me. But thankfully they’re very much happy now. And he and I are still best friends :)

A few years back, my best friend – Fayyadhah - and I had this theory: A guy and a girl cannot be ‘just best friends’ because if that person supposedly knows everything about you, then what is holding the two of you from having a relationship? I guess people would retaliate by saying if there are no feelings, then there are no feelings and you can’t force it. But what’s the point of feelings if there’s no chemistry? What’s the point of passion if there’s no commitment and intimacy? Which coincidentally I believe is what ‘best-friendship’ is made of.

But as I was thinking… All of my BGFs (Best Guy Friends) do have girlfriends. Anyway, it’s like it is only these people that are totally comfortable with me. It’s like, since I’m not their girlfriend and I DO NOT care that much on my behavior around them, they enjoy my ‘boyish’ company. It’s like I’m the substitute to what they don’t have with their girlfriends. And I so don’t mind it at all because I love them so much already. But that’s it. I simply realized that the guys I am usually very close with have girlfriends of their own.

And I guess that is why the guys and I are able to stay best friends. I know them inside and out and for years but my own theory just doesn’t apply to me because they already have their own girlfriends! ;-) Yes, we do have intimacy (heck I’m the one they confide in about their relationship problems) and we are committed to each other (years people, I’m talking two digits here) but circumstances kept pushing us the other way around.

Thus, it seems like I'll forever be 'just the best friend' but at this point in my life, I don't really mind :)

-C-

p/s: It is true what they say, I tend to have a long muqaddimah when my point is actually only a sentence long :p Sorry!