Monday, May 12, 2008

Love talk

I’m not here to talk about my speck or even of my favorite cherry. Elly asked me the other day to write something sweet/romantic in response to His post but I just can’t. I guess I wasn’t able to do so until he started asking me a string of very crucial questions. And thankfully he did.

I have a friend, a very good friend in fact. Here, right here in INTI. I won’t deny that we have a somewhat close relationship. He’s been a good friend since the first time he sent me a message requesting a ride home. This may sound a bit over-the-top but honestly besides Zaim, he was the only one who knows the deepest of my concerns back then. I guess it is partially my fault that I got too attached to him. As in I kind of depended too much on him. And some people misunderstood that.

When I first started going out with Him, people questioned me. Actually, some still do up till this day. I won’t blame them one hundred percent. But I really would love to clear things out today. Yes, I really like my current boyfriend after our initial non-speaking encounter. Yes, I went into this relationship whole-heartedly. Yes, now I can’t think of anyone else except him (permission to puke granted.) BUT there were times when circumstances and the people around me started to mess with my head. No, they didn’t mess up my head – I made it a mess on my own. But I think I’m over that state already.

I want to clarify here that as much as I love Him, I can’t just ignore my other friends. In particular, in the context of today’s post, the one I was referring to earlier. He’s been there for me when I needed someone most. He was there when my car broke down. He was there when I was crying the night my parents went to do their Hajj. He was there when I needed company. Some may say I’m crazy for saying all these things about another guy besides my boyfriend but you know what, I‘m not crazy. My boyfriend already accepted his presence in my life; I suggest the rest of y’all do to and stop the speculation.

Yes, I have my other guy friends whom presence in my life are really appreciated. For me, I don’t like having to deny their impact on my life simply because I have a boyfriend. That’s plain unfair to me and to them. But that doesn’t mean I love RASSYID RAMLAN any less. He’s an addition into my life, not a replacement. For understanding this about me, I thank You very much.

-C-

p/s: I haven’t write for a long time because it’s been hard for me to get hold of an Internet connection for more than half an hour.

p/p/s: To those who have been asking, my Physics is saved :)

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