Pictures!

Just a comparison between the picture in my previous entry with these more recent ones :p

Sorry for tunggang-terbalik-kan the cake :(

There's a lot more people in the picture this time eh? :)

The happy family but without Diana... :(

Pink ELLY!

And last but not least, I think this is the first time I'm posting a picture of us :)

-C-

Ali's Birthday

To some people, birthdays are just another day on the calendar. It possesses no special meaning nor does it call for special attention. They also say that age is just a number so why fuss over the day of turning a year older? Well, those are the opinions of others but they are certainly not opinions of mine. In my opinion, birthdays are almost the same as New Year, Valentine’s Day, or even Independence Day. These days are only special if you see it as special and thus treating it as an extraordinary day - as it should be. And I’m in this category of people.

I have always viewed birthdays as a very special occasion. Not just my birthday but everyone else’s too. For me, birthdays come only once a year and for that one day, you (the birthday boy/girl) are the one of everybody’s attention. And personally, I love making my friends and family feel loved and appreciated for that one particular day. Not saying I don’t love them the rest of the year, but simply a little extra special on their birthdays. I love seeing the smile on their faces because as much as they love to say, “Alah, nothing special la birthday...” they can’t deny the light-hearted feeling that came after someone does something nice for them.

Therefore, that’s why I love surprising my friends on their birthdays especially during my school years. When they would think we don’t remember, I’d choreographed a surprise attack. I love seeing those tears of joy when I do something extra. If there's no surprise whatsoever I would take my friends out or the very least I would do is buy them something. Maybe at the back of my head I’m expecting them to do the same for me *hint hint* Nah, honestly I don’t really bother. As they say, when you give, the persons on both the ends share the same feeling of joy.

With that, I end this post with a HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY ALI IQBAL, MY-FRIEND-FROM-PRIMARY-SCHOOL-THAT-I-MET-AGAIN-ON
-THE-FIRST-DAY-OF-COLLEGE. May you have a good birthday with your chubbywubb! (I don’t know what’s the female version of it is called.)

-C-

Speck

An elephant once said that there might be another world living on a small speck. And dear speck, you are just as the elephant described but much more amazing. In fact you are more amazing compared to the biggest of all the stars in the universe. For me personally it is no fun that a star is so huge that everybody can see it even though it is a thousand light years away. And though it stands true that a star shines beautifully in the darkest night, most of the times a star blind those that look too closely at it.

But you dear speck, I can scrutinize at you for hours on end and all you do to me is hold as much fascination as I can imagine. On a speck like you there could be a million little discoveries and it is endless to someone who analyze everything like me. Therefore speck, I hope you would stop comparing yourself with another star, or any other heavenly being, ever again. But of course I'm not denying that a star is also one of God’s wondrous creation but I hope you would remember that dear speck, so are you. And to think that God made the time just to make an individual you even though it is obvious to the naked eye you seemed and mean nothing.

But not me dear speck, I don’t possess a naked eye. If I do I would be just like the rest of them. But am I? I can’t answer that dear speck for only you are able to show me a sign of your understanding on what I’m trying to say.

For me dear speck, you are special because you are hard to be found. If you are as obvious as the pretty pink rose in front of my eyes right now I could just pulled you and be done with it. But then, a flower dies if it is taken away from its roots. Then tell me, do you still want to be like that sad and vulnerable flower? Please don’t say you do because then being a pretty pink rose makes it impossible for you to experience all the wonders you’ve experienced so far. When the wind blows, it brings you almost everywhere imaginable. But a flower dear speck, it is stuck. It won’t be able to go up into the sky and look down at these petty beings called humans and they definitely can't go across oceans, unlike you.

I’m glad that after all your adventure, the wind decided to bring you to me. You got stuck on my skirt and I felt the itch. It took me a while to realize you were there but thank you for being patient for it pays off, maybe not for you, but definitely for me. A little speck that got stuck on my skirt was able to call for my whole attention. And to think I thought I have numbed myself to almost a corpse.

Dear speck, it’s amazing that despite your size I’m still not over scrutinizing you. Maybe that elephant is correct. Maybe there is a civilization living on you. And dear speck, I would love to get to know each and every person breathing your undoubtedly clean air for you are as virgin as the most virgin forest on a new land.

Therefore, I have a question for you: "Mind if I long for you dear speck?"

-C-

Our Love Story

After the happy day I had today (following the rest happy days I’ve had prior to today), I was suddenly taken back to one of my favorite Lils’ entry which is on “Every couple has their own story.” :) So today, I want to share our story.

Everybody said we didn’t look like a couple early on. Their premature reasons were based on these: We don’t go out every night, we don’t SMS each other constantly, and when we do spend time together we like to talk about what’s happening in the world. But like Lils said, every couple has their own story and this is ours :)

We don’t feel the need to meet up every single night because first of all we see each other in class. Second of all, personally for me, absence does make the heart grows fonder and I surely see my past mistakes now: I don’t understand then that I am first and foremost a student before anything else. So I don’t see anything wrong with us not seeing each other every night if our reason is to study. I think it is romantic that we can NOT see each other yet trust each other more than anyone. (But of course after three nights in a row not spending time with him I would miss his company…)

Second of all, we don’t SMS each other constantly because what can you say every few minutes? I admit, at first I found it weird because I WAS used to SMS-ing whoever I’m currently close with every few minutes/seconds. But then again I see my parents and also any other married couples out there (I’m taking examples of married couples because they already stood the test of time) and they don’t need to ask “Have you eaten?” every few hours. But when I do receive an SMS message from him, it would totally make my day and nobody can take my goofy smile away.

Lastly, talking about world events? I don’t see anything wrong with it. It just shows our character and it is coincidental that our passion is on the same thing. Every couple needs to have that common ground, no? Plus, we save our cute-sy talk only when nobody’s around.

So this is our love story. It doesn’t have to be the same as any other couple, but that doesn’t make us any less a couple. ”Betul tak, ibu, papa?” :)



-C-

p/s: This is our story, but I do respect your choice of a relationship if you respect mine :)

My music, my work.

Zaim had been asking me over and over about my study habit for a while now. Honestly, when people ask me that I somewhat feel bad because I really can’t give you an answer/answers. How do I study? I study just the same as how most of you do, seriously. Maybe one distinct feature of it is that I seriously NEED my music. That’s it. I know some people who said that but then a few minutes later they would put down their headphone. I know some people who said that but a few minutes later they would reduce the volume of their music. I don’t.

See, the thing is, you need to know a few things about me. My peak time to study is at night. It had always been that way. That’s why I don’t even bother to study in the afternoon, or anytime else in the day except when I’m in class. I would rather sleep in the afternoon to make up for my lack of sleep at night because I study best then. And when I was in secondary school, during the night would be the peak time for my whole family to do other things too. Understandable, as they're either working or studying too in the day. My dad would be at his computer blaring his music, my mum would be watching television (and we have a ‘nice’ sound system), and my brother would be playing his PS2 upstairs (another set of ‘nice’ sound system.) Even if I don't have younger siblings, I have them. Therefore, I resorted to my music. Starting from my walkman years, to my Discman, and now to either my cell or my laptop. I HAVE to blast it to the maximum in order to drown out all the other noises in the house. I admit at first it was hard. I would find myself singing along or dancing and not really focusing on my books. But after a few years, I’m an expert already. Even at maximum volume now it doesn’t even bother me or take my focus away. In fact, I can ONLY focus with my music at maximum. If not, even the littlest noise would annoy me.

So yeah, that’s my secret. I would switch on my laptop, put my headphone on, blast my Windows Media Player to the maximum, get my book, open it, and study. That’s it. The rest is just the same as any other student.

-C-

Another Emo Post

If some of you have been observant of my MSN personal messages you would know that I’m a bit…off these days. PMS? I was just congratulating myself this morning when I woke up for I’ve been a good girl without one trace of emo-ness during this time of the month. But to think about it, I’m not emo right now. I’ve just been doing a lot of thinking and I've been doing it on a lot of stuffs.

He said that I do a lot of unnecessary thinking. Is it? Is it really unnecessary for me to think of things...of possibilities? I know, I know. I’m supposed to be the spokesperson for optimism but I admit that there is a limit to it. This is new to me, I already admitted that. But I know this is what it is all about: patience and understanding. In the end, you’re not living in this world alone. But then there would be those days (nights) when I would sit back and think back, taking a break from studying perhaps, and the irony of it all started.

What should I do?

I'm trying not go back to how I was before but circumstances are really having a ball bullying me around with all these ironies. Please...I just need you to explain to me. Communication will always be number one on my list of things to do and I hope you know that…

-C-

p/s: What a day today. No Macroeconomics class this morning therefore Yi Juin, Wenli and I had a walk around campus. Then during Political Science Prof Borges let us off one hour early and it was fun going over our characters for the mock trial. Now we just got back from dinner at McD.

Pre-election

Okay, last night as usual we had our usual conversation/talk/argument over politics. It's not that I want to argue with him so much about it, but he likes to 'provoke' me (his own word). Although he already explained thoroughly last night that he only like to do that because he loves to see my reactions. To him, I seemed like a BA fanatic and an over-sensitive political science student. It came to a point that I could not take it anymore that I kind of 'lashed out' nicely - however that may be - and explained my stand. I told him of why I'm sensitive over the whole BN-BA thing and I ended up spending almost an hour explaining why I'm an opposition supporter.

After that I was quiet for a while.

I know I told you that I was quiet because my head was still spinning and thinking. It was, but actually, the number one reason why I was quiet last night was because I was shocked of myself. Actually, the REAL reason why I decided to hold back my opinions until last night was because I thought I'm not competent enough. I didn't think I have the right or even enough proofs and resources to convince you - or anybody else for the matter. But after you kept pushing me, I realized, wow, I do can talk about it. I mean, I DO have the explanations in my head but somehow all this while I'm not THAT confident of myself yet. I guess because I'm considered still young to understand everything. And another reason is because all my life I had only heard my dad talk. Although what he says make my THINK, I never take the trouble to spread the words to others. But thanks to you, for provoking me, for being sarcastic with me over and over, I discovered that I'm actually ready to spread the truth about the nation's politics :)

I don't know why, but some people think it's ridiculous for me to think too much of Malaysia's political scene and should instead focus on world issues. Sure, I do read aljazeeraonline religiously, but I guess because the problem with our country is faced by me on a daily basis, it struck me that I have to change that one first before I can think of the 'world'. Maybe one day I'll shift my attention to that other 6 billion residents of the world but for the meantime, let me start on the 27 million at home first. Or better, the few hundred people that are within my reach. I'm finally ready to tell you people the truth :)

Thanks to you.

-C-

p/s: interesting blog.